Wednesday, March 18, 2015

Healing Myself, So I can Enjoy Healthy Love Relationships

I’ve been taking a daily class through Daily Om that is called “Intimacy without Responsibility.” It’s a 49 day class and interestingly enough, the creator of the course says that it takes about 7 weeks to change a habit. (7 X 7 . . . )

She is really challenging us to look at our relationships, specifically our Primary love relationship and look for ways where we manipulate, control, wheedle, cajole or use tricks and traits we learned in childhood to get our needs met. (Or not, if you are on the Martyr track…)

It’s been an interesting 7 weeks! I am almost finished with the coursework and can see that I have opened a door to a new way of thinking, living and BE-ing in the world of relationships.

I began this class before the Value beta test that I started about 4 weeks ago and see now how perfectly these two blend together, to accelerate changes in the way I think, believe and heal myself.

One example? I came down with a cold this last weekend and it was MUCH easier to ask Steve for help and support! I didn’t hesitate. My self-care has also been better. I cancelled a client on Saturday, when I came down with the cold. The “old me” would have “soldiered-on,” and been resentful in the process.

Rather, I wrote the client and rescheduled. And, when three more prospective clients contacted me during my down time, I resisted the urge to respond right away. Yesterday, when I felt better (a full 3 days after becoming dis-eased) I contacted the people and let them know my status. All understood, of course!

As I love myself and show better self-love and self-care, I can also learn to love you in a new way: one that allows for true intimacy, without the responsibility for fixing or changing you or meeting your emotional needs.

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